Iris

And I’d give up forever to touch you
‘Cause I know that you feel me somehow
You’re the closest to heaven that I’ll ever be
And I don’t want to go home right now

And all I can taste is this moment
And all I can breathe is your life
And sooner or later, it’s over
I just don’t wanna miss you tonight

And I don’t want the world to see me
‘Cause I don’t think that they’d understand
When everything’s made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am

~The Goo Goo Dolls

I had my first appointment, with my regular doctor, this afternoon. Jackie came with me. She documents everything, in pictures, and I love that about her! I hadn’t mentioned this lump to my doctor, before. He’d scheduled me for a mammogram, because my family history and age meant it was a good time to do one. He’d told me, it’s a good thing to get a baseline, while you’re still younger-ish, and go from there. Of course, I hadn’t actually gone and done this mammogram. When I explained all of this, my doctor said, “Of course not.” and he smiled at me. He is also keenly aware of my reluctance to follow through with medical shit, when it’s about me. He had me put one of those super sexy paper gowns on, and examined me. He says that this lump is “asymmetrical”. That’s not the best news. He sent an order for me to go get the mammogram, as well as an ultrasound of it. They’ll be calling me, within 48 hours, to schedule those things. My doctor insisted, there’s so much that can be done right now, and it’s still early. He told me, if it’s something, they can cut it out, and I go on with my life. That’s it. If I wait until it gets bad, he says, “You don’t want to wait until you have to go make all your hair fall out, and wear pink for the rest of your life.” That made me laugh! I love his sense of humor, and he knows I get it. After he handed me the paperwork, he looked at Jackie, and he asked her to make sure I get this done. She told him she absolutely will, and she’d already promised Adam she would!

The weather was real stormy, when we left. There were both metaphorical, and literal clouds, hanging over us. However, as we drove toward home, the sky got brighter. The rain ended. By the time we got to my house, the sun was shining again.

Justin and Jackie are eating supper here, tonight. We’re all going to hang out. Tomorrow morning, I’ll be picking them up. We leave here, at 4:00am, for the airport. They’re going on their trip to Justin’s hometown. I’m excited for Jackie to meet his family! They seem incredibly sweet. Adam, the kids, and I leave for our own trip, the same day they’ll get back home from theirs. So, it’ll be two whole weeks, before we see each other again.

They’re on their way here, now. I don’t have a whole lot else to say, anyway. This is my update. I still think it could be there’s nothing to worry so much about. Adam will be home any minute. He’s going to run to the store with me, so I can talk to him about everything the doctor said. Then, we’re fixing my “famous” hot ham and cheese Hawaiian sandwiches. We’re going to have a fun evening, with our people. ❤️