Off The Rails

We’ll fucking run it off the rails

~Brantley Gilbert

I didn’t mention it, earlier. I wasn’t sure if I should even write about this, because I can’t stand for anyone to ever read my writing and believe my husband is some kind of bully. The other night, after we got out of our shower, I had sort of flipped off Adam. It wasn’t that serious, and he wasn’t even upset. We were mostly just playing around. He sat on the edge of our bathtub, and pulled me over his lap. As he did that, I swung my head up. My head hit the corner of the little half wall that sticks out from beside our bathtub. I hit it hard. Adam pulled me up, into his arms, and kissed the top of my head. Neither of us realized just how much damage I’d just done to myself. I got ready for bed, and felt sooo sleepy. When we laid in bed, I didn’t mean for it to happen at all, but tears just started quietly flowing from my eyes. As they landed on Adam’s chest, he quickly realized I was crying. My head just kept hurting worse and worse, as I laid there. He went and got me an ice pack, and held it in place for me, until I fell asleep. I woke up a few hours later, and my head felt like it could explode. Such a feeling of pressure and pain! In the morning, I talked to Adam’s mom. She’s a nurse, so I asked her if I should be worried. She asked me lots of questions. I wouldn’t call it “dizzy”, but it sort of felt like my body was swaying as I stood. I was nauseas, and the right side of my face, around my eye, felt numb. I couldn’t feel myself move my eyebrow up and down, on my right side. Then, my right eye kept twitching uncontrollably. I’ve never experienced anything like that! It turns out, I have a concussion. Instead of my head bruising and swelling outward, it’s gone inward. The swelling is pressing up against a nerve somewhere inside my head, which caused all the symptoms I was having. Unfortunately, there isn’t much that can be done, except for ice, Tylenol, and rest. Rest isn’t exactly easy to come by, with little ones under foot. Yesterday was rough, but today’s been much better! I only have sort of a dull headache in just the front right side of my head now.

Adam has been very grumpy, with himself. He’s been super sweet to me, but he’s a grouch at work. I know this, because I was on the phone with him, yesterday, and he yelled to someone “they can wait two fuckin’ minutes! I’m busy!” Then he starts talking to me and says, “I’m sorry, baby.” So, it sounds like all the guys who had to report to him yesterday, got a very “prickly” Adam. He’s never once talked to me or our kids like that, but I have occasionally observed the way he’s spoken to people at work, when they piss him off. It’s one of the many reasons I’m keenly aware of just how gentle and patient he actually is, with his family.

Anyhow, it was a complete accident. He never in a million years would hurt me. I am not even a tiny bit afraid of my husband. I just decided to go ahead and mention this, here, because I like to be honest about my life. Even the crap. So, here y’all go.