Just wanted to leave this here. I think it’s the first slideshow I’ve only smiled as I watched without the familiar ache that usually comes as I view them, in much too long a while. We do find some happy together. We’re picking up our broken pieces, and we’re building something new and different. While some parts simply cannot be mended or replaced, we will fill the vacancies with something new to love, as best we can. There are some parts that are in the process of healing. Parts I am only recently discovering could be mended. I think, in my grief and despair, I lost faith in everything. I couldn’t see how any of the things I cherished would ever be salvageable. My whole world had been damaged, and much of it irreparably. Not all of it, though. I discarded all the pieces, in my disbelief they would fit into the new me and this different life of mine. I shouldn’t have done that. I didn’t have to let go of all that mattered to me, because some was gone. Maybe I was punishing myself? Whatever the reason, I’m motivated to sort through the mess and to pick back up as much as I possibly can. I want to do things I used to enjoy. I want to spend time doing things that make me feel like me. Simple stuff, like turning on some music while I clean and organize and decorate my home. Like baking with my children. Like taking Oliver on a walk. As easy as that might seem, I have built roadblocks for myself that prevented me from easily finding my way back to those things. I made myself too busy and too distracted to have the time. I’m ready to make time, now. So, I’m actually learning to dance in the rain. I am finding hope and just enough faith that this storm will pass. One day, we’ll again be able to bask in the warmth of the sun shining brightly upon us. Every so often, that sunshine does peek through these clouds. It reminds me that this too shall pass. That’s something I spent a lot of time convinced just wasn’t possible. Slowly, in nearly unnoticed tiny steps, I’ve managed to move forward. Those steps, however small, add up. Suddenly, I’m able to look back and see that we have moved toward a much more comfortable place. Although the storm isn’t over for us yet, it will be. I just have to keep going. Eventually, we’ll get there, and then it’ll be time for a whole new adventure.
❤️
Chronicles in Submission 