Yes Sir

I’m not going to suggest that I always give Adam an enthusiastic “yes sir”. I rarely call him “sir” if I’m being honest. It’s a skill you learn well living down where we do. Our kids know when their Mama hollers for them, “yes ma’am” is the correct response. They don’t necessarily use that phrase in every conversation between us, though. There are times when it is called for. Adam has only recently began to demand it from me during said times it might be called for. As I have mentioned before, I can be stubborn. If I’m in a cooperative mood, I might freely give him the expected “yes sir”. Other times, I attempt to refuse. The phrase “Do you understand?” Is a great example. It might take a few more smacks on my butt to even get the “yes” out of me, let alone a “yes sir”. I find it incredibly sexy when he holds me to it. Even if I might be feeling stubborn and refusing (at first) to say it. Expecting, even demanding a “yes sir” is one of the ways Adam establishes his authority in those moments. Whether I want to admit it or not, he is in charge right now and I need to let him know I recognize that. “Yes sir” is a simple, yet powerful way to do this. I think the most attractive thing Adam can do is to put me in my place when I need it. The truth is, I don’t want to be in charge of him. If I’m doubting his ability to lead well, things as small as requiring me to address him as an authority lets me know that he has, in fact, still got this.

I actually have some pretty good ideas sometimes. And I’m right about things from time to time too! I don’t want him to belittle or ignore my opinions. I just love when he absolutely requires me to share them with a respectful attitude rather than one of “authority”. I can convince him of damn near anything if I do it sweetly, respectfully. Being a rude or bitchy wife shouldn’t get me anywhere, and I recognize this when I’m calm. Reasonable, sane me understands how important all this is to me. Unreasonable me, the one filled with rage and adrenaline me, struggles. I might still believe I am right with my idea or my opinion, but I don’t believe I should “win” any arguments by belittling, insulting, or disrespecting Adam. In fact, that’s exactly the kind of crap where I need him to take charge and “put me back”. Remind me that he’s my husband, I’m his wife. He isn’t talking to me like I am to him. He isn’t belittling me in front of anyone. I shouldn’t be doing that either.