No Doubt About It

…like coffee needs a cup, you know that it ain’t much good without it. We were meant to be together. No doubt about it. This old Neal McCoy song, is Adam and my “song”. We had our first dance together, as a married couple, to this song.

My daughter went with me on a few errands, the other day. She told me about a dream she had, the night before. She said she dreamed that her daddy cheated on mama and her and her brother were “beating him up”. She told me, “I know daddy would never do that to you. I don’t know why I dreamed that?” I assured her that her daddy and I aren’t going anywhere. She said, “y’all are meant for each other”.

So many of the people close to my babies have divorced parents. I can only think of one friend Mj has, who’s parents are still together. Adam’s dad passed away before the kids had a chance to know him. My parents are divorced. Jackie doesn’t have her parents. Jackie is divorced, but she isn’t a parent. My sister’s husband’s parents are divorced. Most all of my kids’ friends split their time between their mom and dad’s houses. That poor baby is so afraid that’ll happen to her one day. Adam and I are both committed to making sure that never happens, though. I will fight like hell to never have my babies have to come from a “broken” family. I told my daughter yesterday, that tree we buried her rats under, it’s a young tree. It’s going to grow up and the circle of life will make it so that her pets become part of that tree. One day, she’ll come home, with her babies, and they’ll stand under the shade of that tree. I pray my kids are able to come home to their mom and dad, for a long, long time.

Having said all that, I’m frustrated with Adam, today. We have a couple of different pest control companies we’ve hired. One of them is just for termite protection. The other one, is for keeping things like spiders, fleas, mosquitos, etc. out of the house. The termite company has been amazing. The other one, beyond annoying. I regret that I signed a year long contract with them. They were supposed to be coming out 5 times per year. IF we still had any issues, between scheduled visits, they’d come out free of charge. I hired them in August. They have been here 3 times, already. Each time, we’ve been charged. I never even requested they come out for any of those. I got a text, a couple weeks ago, saying they were scheduled to come by again. We haven’t had issues with bugs or anything. I told them, NO. I’m not going to have them come out, for the fourth time in 3 months, and then turn around and charge me another $129! I got another text, today. He asked me when is a good time to reschedule? I explained all of this to him. They’re coming in December now. I got it worked out. I told Adam about all of this, this morning. Then, he asked me why I hadn’t said anything to him before today. I told him, I had it under control. I handled it! I felt proud of myself for standing my ground with those guys! Adam feels like I should’ve told him, when this all started to become an issue, weeks ago. I didn’t think it was necessary to dump stupid crap like this on him, especially with the stress he’s got due to end of the year stuff at work. I knew I could figure it out, and I did. I assured him, if it had become a problem that I couldn’t solve myself, I’d have come to him. I would have! He insists that he’s repeatedly asked me to keep him updated and involved in all financial matters. I get that, but this wasn’t a bill! I don’t know. Unless I can talk my way out of it, before he gets home, he’s going to spank me tonight. I think that’s excessive, though. I handled the bullshit myself. I’m capable of dealing with things, too. I love Adam so much, but he can sure drive me crazy, sometimes. I’m struggling not to send a string of angry text messages to him, right now.

Also, it’s absolutely freezing cold here, today! It’s dreary and wet and cold. I need some sunshine. Lord, please help me not to lose my shit.