It’s Everest, I know It’s impossible, you’re too young or too old That’s what they tell you So that’s what you tell you too So the light, it fades When you figure out the rules, they change When you touch it in your hands, it’s sand Slipping through, but the truth is
Everybody says that you can’t ’til you do Standing there, staring at the mirror in the room Tell yourself “One more day, one more day, one more shot” The voices in the night, in your head Yeah, they’ll pay you to quit They’ll tell you that it’s hard, ’cause it is But you can do anything, anything you want to There’s footprints on the moon
~Gabby Barrett
I’m running out of time to write much here, tonight. It’s been another busy day. I had an appointment, in Nashville. When I got back home, I made monotonous phone calls, and then I put on some music. I got a lot of housework done. Mj’s been busy, with lots of days of flags practice. School officially starts back, next week. How did another Summer come and pass by, so quickly?! I’m taking her school shopping, tomorrow.
While I was cooking supper, I got to thinking about some things I’d been wanting to talk about. I uploaded a video, and it’s posted on my YouTube channel now.
Other than all that, I don’t have a whole lot else to say. I’m going to put “I Love Lucy”, on the TV, and work on some craft projects. I’ve got just about an hour, before it’ll be time to hop in the shower with Adam, and then get ready for bed. Goodnight, y’all. ♥️
Pray the morning don’t come These colors don’t run Stay up and stay young
American nights
~Morgan Wallen
Yesterday was so much fun! Mikayla always “crashes”, when she comes back home. She didn’t get up, until after noon. She’s been working so hard, and I’m extremely proud of her. I’m proud of all my girls! Brooklyn decided to pursue her associates degree, and has been taking classes during the days, while also working a full time job, overnights. She’s done an impressive job, already saving up a good amount of money for herself, too. I still sometimes just marvel at how much all my girls have grown, but especially my Brooklyn. Brooklyn was born, more than two months premature. She was diagnosed with autism and sensory processing disorder, right after her third birthday. She didn’t start speaking, until nearly a year later. She can be very literal and blunt, in her thinking and her words. It isn’t always easy for her to recognize the subtle cues in how others say things, their facial expressions, things like that. She sometimes misunderstands, after mistaking someone’s intentional sarcasm for genuine emotion. On the other hand, she’s also super funny! She makes me laugh, a lot. We tease that she’s got the same personality as her cat. Whenever a stranger comes around, she disappears. Once she gets comfortable, though, she will open up. She’s a great judge of character, too. She seems to quickly recognize and discern, who can and cannot be trusted. She, herself, is sincere to the point of often being “brutally honest”. My sister’s always said, if she wants to feel good about herself, she’ll ask Mikayla’s opinions. If she wants the truth, she’ll ask Brooklyn. I admire the way Brooklyn never compromises her true feelings or beliefs, for anything or anyone else. She had to learn how to be a little bit more delicate, when sharing her opinions with others, but she’ll always tell you the truth if you ask her for it. During her Senior year of high school, and while I was working outside the home and our family were all going through the toughest season of our lives, she grew into this beautiful and brave young woman. I almost missed the subtle changes in her, for awhile. As that year progressed, it occurred to me just how strong and helpful she’d been. She took on almost all of the daily household chores. She became Mj’s second mama, and really paid close attention to Mj’s struggling. She spent hours listening and talking, with her. She did her best to make life fun, for all of us. In those firsts, like the first holidays without some of the people we wouldn’t celebrate with, she was goofy and wanted to cheer up our heavy hearts. She kept up her grades, in school. Never had missing or incomplete work. As much as I truly appreciate all she did for everyone, including me, I also felt tremendous guilt. This never should have been her burden to carry. Her last year to be a “kid”, should have been filled with fun and friends. Not dirty dishes, laundry, making sure her little sister brushed her teeth before school, and looking after her mama. I should’ve been much more present with her, and aware. I look back, and see just how selfish I’d been. Running from the turmoil, trying to avoid having to look at the damage done to our family. To my babies. When she had to have her knee surgery, I’d already begun to recognize these things I hadn’t been, but so wanted to do again, with and for my babies. Her health challenge was just the final push, that convinced me what and where I needed to do and be. I was not going to let her go through that, without being right beside her. I can’t ever “make up’ for the time I missed, with my girls, but I did do my darndest to be fully present, from then on. I’m still determined to be a better mama. To give them what they need and deserve. Now, Brooklyn is no longer a child, and is carving her own path in life. Although I do miss the hell out of her, I’m also hella proud to of her. I’m hella proud of all of them! Mikayla’s wicked smart. Like, well beyond my own capabilities. She’s doing these absolutely incredible things. Achieving her goals and dreams, like the badass she is. She’s an actual freaking rocket scientist, and she’s proving to be a damn good one at that. Brooklyn’s continuing to challenge herself, leaving her comfort zone so that she can learn and grow, and build her very own beautiful life. Mj’s grown more than hips and boobs, too. She’s maturing, quickly. I find myself having deep conversations with her. Real, grown up type of talks, about big topics. She’s doing color guard, taking after her big sister, Mikayla. She’s got a real good group of friends. She’s become awfully “boy crazy” recently, as well, which her daddy claims is making his beard turn gray. Haha! Mj is a teenage girl. A young lady, who’s figuring out what and who she wants to be. My goal is to support and encourage my girls. To guide them, as best I can, and to be a mama who they’ll always want to include, as they navigate along their own journeys.
We celebrated the Fourth of July, swimming, talking, giggling, baking, eating, and shooting fireworks. It only rained briefly, shortly after we got started with our fireworks. We sat and waited for the rain to pass, and then were able to get right back to it. Adam and the girls had a blast. I had the best Fourth of July, in years. Maybe, the best one ever, actually. I loved seeing my carefree, smiling family. I wasn’t plagued by the same sadness, that had clung to me, for the past two July Fourths. I feel “lighter”. I’m more free than I’ve felt, in a long time. I can acknowledge the aches and pains, that might bubble up from time to time, without being consumed by them. My shine is no longer dimmed. My sparkle’s back. I’ve been able to allow my present joy to fill in the spaces, where I’d held onto past hurts. Change doesn’t require that nothing stays the same. It often happens without even noticing, until more time passes. Hours become days. Days become weeks. Weeks become years. Before you know it, you’ve gotten a little bit older. A little bit wiser. A little bit stronger. It seems that I too, have grown.
And I’m looking at you With the world in the rear view
You were pretty as can be, sitting in the front seat Looking at me, telling me you love me And you’re happy to be with me on the 4th of July
~Shooter Jennings
We were supposed to be going out on a pontoon boat, with some friends, yesterday. Unfortunately, the weather decided not to cooperate with those plans. It stormed, alllll afternoon, into the evening. Since that also meant Adam couldn’t grill our supper, he fried us some bacon. We ate BLT’s, instead. After supper, we sat around and played games. Although not the way we intended our day to be spent, we had a lot of fun, anyhow.
Today, we’re hoping to be able to spend time, outside, weather permitting. This will be our first time spending the Fourth, at home, since we moved to this house! We’ve got lots of fireworks, this year, and our neighborhood also has a big party. I’m excited to do some swimming, play some cornhole, eat some yummy bbq, and watch the fireworks.
I spent today hanging out with my kid, and it was a blast. I woke up full of goofy energy, and it translated into a really fun afternoon, with Mj. Adam was late, getting home from work. From pretty much the first moment he walked in the door, my silly was turnt up to a 10. I suppose my unmedicated ADHD brain could be to blame, but my family laughs with me, so I don’t think it’s a problem.
Mj and I made some fruit pastries, this afternoon.
I made fiestadas, for supper, and recorded a video I’ll share here. The video quickly devolves into utter chaos, but if anyone needs a laugh, you’ll not be disappointed.
I spent the entire day down in our basement, cleaning, reorganizing, and rearranging things. I hung new curtains. I took one of my cube shelves, and I added wood grain contact paper to the top. I’m really proud of how that turned out!
Tomorrow, I’m taking Mj out for coffee. We’re going to do a little shopping, too. Then, on Friday, we’re planning to take that hike we’ve been wanting to. Last Sunday, it was humid, hot, and crazy windy. That night, storms blew through. We wound up with a tornado warning. The first of this year, for us.
We didn’t really end up seeing much action, though. Just wind.
We woke up, Monday morning, to temps down into the thirties! It was cold, Monday and Tuesday. Today, it warmed back up into the 60’s. Tomorrow, we get back to high 70’s-mid 80’s, for the foreseeable future.
I’m such a night owl, these days. Adam asks me to come to bed by 11pm, weeknights. I usually do, too. Last night, though, it was after midnight before I climbed next to him in bed. He pulled me into his arms, and told me if I’d come to bed earlier, I’d have gotten laid. I asked, what if I wanted to get laid, now? He insisted, he needed to sleep more than he needed sex, at that point. I put on my best pouty face, looked up at him and said, more than you need me?? Adam looked back at me, grinned, and told me to take off my pants. Just as my “rollercoaster” was about to reach the top, the ride was over. I told Adam, I deservvve thisss… and I did, in fact, deserve it. Therefore, I’ll be making absolutely certain my butt’s in bed earlier, tonight.
So, on that note, it’s time for me to go upstairs, get naked, and shower with my husband.
That girl can take a gray sky and paint it blue She can put the smooth in the 90 proof She can hang the moon in a sundress Even put a sinner on a front pew She can make shining diamond Out of West Virginia coal She can put a smile on a weeping willow
~Warren Zeiders
She didn’t even know I took this pic, lolI drove past my old neighborhood, the other day. The trees, just before its entrance, look so pretty.
It’s definitely starting to look and feel a lot like Spring, here. Everything’s growing, blooming, blossoming. The grass, the trees, and my babies. Mj’s having a much better year, this year, than last. She’s growing up so fast, I can hardly even keep up with the changes. She can be a broody young teenager, moods swinging so quick they’ll gimmie whiplash, some days. Most days, though, she’s still my sweet little girl. Just a little bit less little. We got her a ridiculously expensive gaming laptop, for Christmas. She loves playing online games with her friends, but also she’ll often get her sisters on FaceTime, and they’ll all play Sims or something. I love it that they do that. It makes me happy, they’re all still so close.
Last Saturday, Mj had her last flags competition for this season. I did her makeup, and took her there. Awhile later, Adam got a phone call from Mikayla. She was in tears, sitting in the waiting room of Urgent Care. The night before, she’d been working her waitressing job, when the whole place filled with smoke. She told us she’d felt perfectly fine, but just a couple hours later, she was coughing, and it was getting harder and harder for her to breathe. She’d woke up that morning, feeling even worse. She had been planning on coming home, for the week, over her school’s Spring Break. Both Adam and I were very worried about her. We anxiously waited for her to see the doctor, and make sure she was okay. Fortunately, the doc said it was just a coincidence that her symptoms first appeared shortly after the smoke exposure. What she actually had, was influenza. Mj, B, and I all got our flu shots, in the Fall. I’d reminded Mikayla, multiple times, to stop by any minute clinic or pharmacy, and get hers. Unfortunately, she hadn’t gotten it done. Since her symptoms had only begun hours before she saw a doctor, he prescribed a round of Tamiflu, to help fight the virus. He also prescribed her a strong cough medicine, which would make her sleepy. I talked with her, while she picked up her medications. My poor kid was still crying and just plain miserable. She wanted to drive home. As much as I wanted her to be here, I told her absolutely not! She didn’t need to be out on the roads, driving home alone, as sick as she was. Adam had been in a darn near panic, and wanted to jump in his truck and go down to Knoxville to get her. With Mj at her competition, she wouldn’t be back until late that night. One of us needed to be able to pick Mj up. I offered to drive to Knoxville, and stay the night there with Mikayla. Then, I could at least follow her home, if she was up to it, on Sunday. By the time she got her meds and back to her house, she’d calmed down and decided she wanted to just get into her bed and sleep. So, Adam and I checked in with her, that night and all the next day, Sunday. By Monday, she was feeling a lot better. She drove home, that afternoon.
Oh, and Mj’s team placed third, at their competition!
Mikayla left, this morning, headed back to Knoxville. Adam was helping a friend put up fence, today. This evening, he grilled us a couple racks of ribs. I made scalloped potatoes, and cut up cucumber slices in vinegar water with onion. I love it when our meals look so pretty and colorful!
I spent the day working on laundry, and cleaning up around the house. I’ve been getting my Spring decor all set out. I’ve also been spending a few hours, here and there, making new craft projects.
I’ve kinda got a rustic/silly theme for our hall bathroomI put a matching lampshade on our floor lamp, so it goes with my other one there on the cabinet, in our dining room. I really like it! Should’ve done that a long time ago.
It’s been another busy week, but it was fun having my girls all here. Mj’s Spring Break is this coming week. So, she’ll be home, hanging out with me all week. I’ve got a handful of things for us to do. Some of them she probably won’t be too excited about, like cleaning all the upstairs bedrooms and bathrooms. I think she’ll have fun going hiking with me, over in the caves near us, though. Of course, we’ll surely also be making a trip, or three, to our favorite coffee spots.
On Thursday, I’d been out with my girls all afternoon. Adam didn’t get home from work, until nearly 8:00pm. By the time we all got home, it was too late to really cook supper. I made one of the quick and easy meals everybody here likes, Fritos chili cheese wraps. For anybody interested, I’ll drop the link for them, here.
A couple weeks ago, on my way home from an appointment in Nashville, I was feeling a little blue. I tried to fight it, to push those feelings down. As if on cue, this song played. I’ve had it in my playlists for at least a couple years, but it was the most perfect lyrics for my mood!
A few days after that, I’d had an appointment with my eye doctor. I had finally lost my last pair of eyeglasses, and I really hate driving at night without them. Since at least a year ago, I’ve been swearing my eyesight has gotten noticeably better, and I wasn’t wrong! My astigmatism still prevents me from seeing well, at night, but during the daytime, I’m perfectly fine. My prescription was pretty mild before, but now it’s barely a prescription for anything more than my astigmatism. My eye doctor kept insisting it’s incredibly rare for an adult’s eyesight to improve. Somehow, mine has gotten markedly better, though!
Then, about a week ago, I began to hear about this crazy winter storm heading our way. They were calling for us to get up to 20 inches of SNOW!!! I’d never seen that much snow in my life! As it turned out, I still have yet to see anywhere near that amount of snow accumulation. Nope, instead we wound up with about 4 inches of snow, with another 3 inches of sleet and ice layered on top of it. Adam had gotten a giant generator, capable of running our heat, most of our outlets and light switches. He got it plugged into the outlet meant for it, down in our garage, just in case. I really hoped we wouldn’t have to use it, though. I’d gotten plenty of groceries, made sure my car had a full gas tank, and ran any errands needed, before we’d be homebound for several days.
We woke up, on Saturday morning, to some light snowflakes beginning to fall.
An hour later, the snow began to accumulate.
That evening, we started seeing the shift to more ice being predicted to accumulate from freezing rain. Sunday morning, we looked out our windows to find some seriously weighed down trees and power lines.
I’m not sure how we got so lucky, but we never did lose power! My dad lost power from around 5am Sunday morning, through just yesterday afternoon.
We ventured out, just yesterday, for the first time since before this storm arrived.
School’s canceled through this whole week, and Adam hasn’t been to work, either. He’s planning to go in for awhile, tomorrow. I’m going a little stir crazy, being stuck here at home, but this is the first time my new car’s seen winter weather, and I’m not convinced she’ll care much for it! Things have been melting, during the daytime, and then refreezing overnight. Our roads are still pretty messy.
I tried a new recipe, from TikTok. They used Ramen noodles, which I substituted with cooked macaroni noodles. I drained the noodles, and poured them into a casserole dish. Then, I mixed in a can of tomato soup, and 2 cans of chili (without beans). I baked it in the oven, at 350 degrees, for about half an hour. I topped it with shredded cheddar cheese, popped it back in the oven for about 5 minutes, and it was ready. My family gobbled it up! Mj says it reminds her of canned ravioli, and Adam asked me to add that to my cookbook, so I can make it for supper again.
Being trapped within the confines of my home has resulted in lots of baking, yummy meals, and a very organized and clean house, at least!
I hit rock bottom all alone. I cry so much, I can’t cry no more.
Mixed emotions. I’m feelin’ lost. I got bad dreams and broken thoughts.
I’m breaking down. I’m full of shame. Darkness all around and I’m filled with pain.
Self-possessed. Feeling stressed. My heart been broke. Full of regret.
Calamity damage, loss and pain. I’m so fucked up. Not right in the brain.
I got deep rooted problems, and I can’t find peace.
I can’t hear over demons in my ears. Don’t know who I am when I look in the mirror.
I don’t know who I am anymore. These vices got me feeling low. I think I’m about to lose control. The darkness sometimes feels like home.
I fall down. I fall down. I fall down.
Oh, won’t you help me now?
~Willy Kay
* For the record, I have not used or taken any form of alcohol or drugs. When things were normal, I could drink a few beers with my friends, but not now. I recognize the danger anything that can alter or numb my mind poses. I haven't even taken any of the Valium prescribed to me. I cannot use any of these things as a "crutch". What begins as "Just this once... Today's been a HARD day... Just one pill... One drink...", becomes a full-fledged mind and body addiction to the substances that numb the hurt. I have not, and will not, accept one single opportunity to soothe myself with drugs and/or alcohol. A lot of the songs I post here reference drugs/alcohol. While I absolutely relate to every mention of addiction's struggle, that's from a long ago past of mine. I've grown wiser, and know better than to let that particular demon grab hold of me again.
I think some clarification is needed. There are still many things I just CANNOT speak or write about. Things that would give much needed explanation for these broad clarifications I’m going to attempt to write here. That’s the toughest part of sharing any of it. Without including every why, where, when, how…things appear as only twisted pieces of the truth. The twists only reveal some of the worst parts, without any excuse or explanation for them. Unfortunately, I would be risking our future, if I was to discuss too much of our past. It’s our past revelations that could best create a complete and accurate picture of these why’s, where’s, when’s, and how’s. There will be a time and place for my entire story to be told. It’s just not today. It won’t be tomorrow, either. We’ve got a long journey ahead of us, Adam and I, and our family. The things that happened in May were not the beginning. They were actually the end of a beginning that I hadn’t ever mentioned here.
Well, here goes…
My husband is looking at a MINIMUM of THREE YEARS in PRISON, if he’s convicted of the shit he was charged with. Three fucking years. Adam had never once been in trouble with the law. He’d never been handcuffed, arrested, charged, or convicted of a crime. Because of this situation, we’ve both had no choice but to expose deep dark secrets we’ve kept to ourselves, until this. Secrets that help to protect Adam and provide clarity to the reasoning behind his actions that awful night. Secrets that hurt us both to have to share. Over the past couple of months, even deeper and darker secrets have come to our attention. Ones that both horrify us, as well as break our hearts.
Our babies don’t know but a fraction of what’s been happening, but even the tiny bits and pieces they are aware of are causing them fear and worry and pain. Mikayla knows more, because she’s not only an adult, but she’s intimately aware of most of these secrets and was involved in the evening that started us down this path that feels like hell.
We have also spent well into tens of thousands of dollars on this shit, already. Fear of draining our savings accounts, as well as the very real possibility of my husband ending up in prison, have been another added concern. If Adam is convicted, he would no longer be able to provide for our family. In the midst of this chaos, I’ve been applying and interviewing for jobs. I just recently got hired onto one of the positions I’d applied for. I will be working Monday through Friday, as a loan specialist, beginning this coming Monday. I actually think I’ll enjoy the work I’m doing, but I can’t help the sadness I feel about saying goodbye to my career as “just” a wife and mother. A “homemaker”. I loved that job, most of all. No paid position could ever compete with the joy and satisfaction I’ve gotten in taking care of my home and family. My kids are forced to grow up real fast, now. It feels as if we’ve stolen the innocence they still had left.
Life is not only already a very screwed up kind of different, but there’s only certainty about more changing, all too soon. We aren’t able to predict which ways things will change, either. I have no say in most of what’s to come. I’m a mere passenger, stuck on this ride, on a trip I never bought a ticket to. I’m not sure where we’re going, or when we’ll arrive. Each stop along the way seems to create new worries about where I’m being taken, and add more to my heartache in reminiscing about the place I used to live.
As time has passed, and truths have surfaced, Adam has garnered a lot of support. Even Justin and Jackie have seen it, now. Despite this, I can’t contemplate forgiveness or healing with Jackie, right now. I’m not sure that’s ever going to be possible. I have so much hurt caused by the betrayals of a person I trusted most in this world. Someone who knew better than anybody about the storm that had been brewing, long before it eventually wreaked this havoc on us. All the conversations we’d shared with Justin and Jackie, in Adam and my desperation to find solutions to these problems (secrets we’d kept close about the other person involved in the altercation with Adam, in May) that we seemed unable to solve ourselves. We trusted the things we said would remain between only the four of us. We trusted them to have our backs, at least enough to validate our intention and motivation behind things said and actions taken. While I’ll be first to admit, I screw up sometimes, I wouldn’t ever, not in a million years, want to cause harm to anyone. That’s not who my husband is, either. Adam is a GOOD MAN. He’s not some aggressive bully, who can’t control his temper. I know my husband. I well understand the intent meant in his actions that he’s being prosecuted for. Those only give a grainy snapshot of one brief moment in time, without the context of circumstances leading to it. It’s awful to be judged or condemned based on only that one part of one sentence from this novel that hasn’t yet been read by anyone else. He’s also not a liar. That’s something any and every person who knows him would vouch for. He shares the title for “most honest human” with my dad. Adam is harder on himself than anyone. He holds himself to near impossible standards, and still only judges himself if they’re not met. He’s quick to forgive the mistakes made by others he cares about. He takes responsibility for our mistakes. He blames himself. Whether at work, or at home. Even now, in this mess, his greatest concerns are for the people he’s responsible for.
Knowing my husband might be taken from me and from our children, means I’ve had to step into a very different role, just in case. In case he won’t be able to do all the things he’s always done for us. It’s the little things that get me the most. I can’t sleep, when I’m alone in bed. Nothing and no one can give me the kind of comfort I feel, when he holds me in his strong arms. It hurts that, even though he’s still right here, I can’t quite find that same assurance in his embrace. I’m always aware of this looming cloud hovering over us. It reminds me, it’s in charge. Adam can’t protect me from this. Neither of us has the power to decide what happens, when the time for judgement gets here. When this trip ends, and I finally find out where we’re going to next. Either way, it isn’t “home”. That place doesn’t exist anymore.
If I don’t have music playing in the background, I’ll have a podcast I’m listening to. I’ve heard some interesting ones, recently. People talking about “high value men”, and women’s “body counts”. I discovered my husband is in the top 3.25% of American men. Statistically, only 15% of men are taller than 6 feet. If you also want him to be good looking, not obese or ugly, that halves, to 7.5%. If you want him making over $100,000 a year, it halves again. So, he’s 3.25% of men. I’ve always highly valued my man, but I hadn’t ever looked at it like that. According to the “experts” on this podcast, “high value men” cheat. Women shouldn’t expect them to be faithful, because all women are fighting for the top 10% of men. If they’re in that, you can’t expect monogamy. Bullshit! I didn’t marry him when he was making money. We struggled and sacrificed. We have built the life we have, together! Even Adam gives me credit, in his success. If I didn’t take care of our kids, our home, him, then he wouldn’t have been able to devote the same time and energy into his career. He had an old college friend come by, one time. His friend was going on and on about how his wife didn’t ever do anything, because she was a new mom. They had a 4 month old new baby! Adam looked at his friend, and told him “I could never trade places with Eve. She works hard, everyday. It’s not easy to take care of our babies, our home, our finances, and she does an amazing job of it.” Hearing my husband say those words, especially to this friend of his, stuck with me all this time! It means a lot to me, when he appreciates me, too.
Truthfully, he definitely works harder than I do. Just compare our hands. He has rough, calloused hands. Mine are soft and smooth. My day is easier than his, even on the harder days. I texted him, awhile back, and told him about what my morning had entailed. The dog threw up on our bed. Our daughter was sick. She’d been throwing up. There was a lot happening, but I told him I’m here washing our bedding, after having to clean up puke all morning, and thinking, I am so grateful that I can be here, taking care of our baby when she’s sick. Even when I’m doing the dirtiest jobs, I would rather be here, cleaning up puke, than doing Adam’s job! He’d rather be doing what he does, to take care of his family. I’d rather be doing what I do, to take care of my family. We see such value in each other, and the way we each contribute to our family. I think some folks out in “podcast land”, have cynical ideas about men and women. Like men want beauty and sex, and women look at men like wallets. It makes me sad for the people who go through life, with that type of mindset. Relationships aren’t about “what can you give me”. Fulfillment comes from the things I can do for my husband, and vice versa, for him with me. It’s not supposed to be a 50/50 partnership. You both give everything you can. We choose to love each other. You don’t always feel like it. You do it anyway. These people, who only see relationships as a transaction, they’re missing out on something so beautiful.
I couldn’t imagine starting over. The connection Adam and I have built together, is worth more than all the money and sex ever could be. There’s more to life than just money and sex. It makes me sad that there are people who might never know that for themselves.
I had a lot of fun with my kids, yesterday! My first favorite song, when I was a little girl, was “Ghostbusters”. I played it while the kids were getting ready and danced around the kitchen singing it with them. Mj dressed as “Max” from the TV show “Stranger Things”. Our son dressed up as a baseball player. He’s obsessed with baseball, these days.
I swear, it was like a Hallmark channel movie, on our street, last night. This was our first Halloween in our new home. I loved it. Speaking of Hallmark movies…it is now, officially, November. My son asked me this morning, “Mama, do you know what time it is??” I replied, “6:19am?” He goes, “CHRISTMAS TIME!!!” Haha, my kid knows his mama. I absolutely love Christmas. I’m excited to decorate here in our new house this year, too. When I took the kids shopping for their last minute costume supplies, the stores had all the Christmas holiday stuff out. I started singing it’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas. Somehow, my kids aren’t all that embarrassed by me, yet! My son had also found a scarecrow for me, while we were shopping. Our dog had chewed my old one up, last year. He asked me which one I liked and then he threw it in the buggy and assured me, if Dad says anything, He put it in there and I didn’t know a thing about it. I have great kids 😆
Adam was a little less “cold” toward Jackie, last night. He responded to her when she spoke to him. He didn’t look quite as angry or “hard”. Hopefully, time will heal this, too. Other than all that, things have been going great here. I believe in the magic of the Christmas season. I love the way everyone takes the time to be a little more courteous, more giving of themselves, kinder, generous, forgiving. I have faith. It’ll all work out.
Chronicles in Submission 